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well I ended up getting laid off or something like that so I'm back here taking more abuse from Lon. I want to finish my thoughts from earlier:

If I'm so goddammed great why am I so suicidal? Well I am, unfortunately, only human, and I need to have at least one flaw, right? I'm entitled to one character flaw, one conflict. Keepin it real.... I mean, what would happen if I got this fantastic wall completed? If I finally did perfect myself, had no inner-conflicts at all, no contradictions in my personal philosophy, man you guys would be in big trouble. So what should I use to finish the wall? This ain't no Maginot Line either, I'm covered on all sides! My turrets go 360 baby! Then where will you all be, when I am free of weakness and complexities like that? When I no longer feel pain or emotion or anything at all, all of my actions preprogrammed and instinctual, following a set plan, achieving a a goal, acquiring a target.... ahh my mental divergence is almost complete, I'll be going back to Kapax soon.

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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