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Woke up at 4, nice five hours of sleep. Im manic as all hell right now and I'm hoping it last thru the night. I work tonight, actually I have to leave in 20 minutes cuz Im walking and Im not even ready to go plus I need to do up the dishes I dirtied and put away the guitars and shit. I was walking around the house, pacing actually, and playing the fuck out of Receeding Mohawk, and Im coming along with the singing and playing at the same time shit but it's so fucking hard. I need someone to play it and let me sing it or else the other way round, just a couple times to get the rhythms outta my head. I originally go online 2 hours ago to check the accuracy of my own damn lyrics and ended up dicking around on myspace and shit like that when I coulda been playing more guitar. It's all good. Someday my artistic genius will be discovered and I'll be alright (alright meaning dead...). Today I planned out a painting, only it's in my head, but yeah it'll get done at some point, I have time, it's going to be a birthday gift for someone and the bday isnt until February. I'm not making much sense or well I'm not saying anything interesting so I shouldnt be saying anything at all huh. I'm not looking forward to work. I still dont have my bike yet. Gary visited for about an hour, he took off walking doen to the lumberyard before 9pm so he doesnt have to pay cover, he said he'd try to get my bike tonight. He doesnt have anywhere to sleep tonight, he's hoping he can track down Rick, and Rick'll let him sleep in the house or the camper. I dont have off until Thursday night, tho I may be able to do karaoke Sunday if Im still doin a 2-10. Thursday is the only day off I have until Saturday the 30th. I think that's the same week. I dont fucken know or really care at this point, life's been in fast forward, like Im always wishing it would. And I'm just along for the ride. It's been three months since I seen Geoff, since I found out my license isnt valid in NY, but it's like yesterday, ya know? And school starts in January and it seems like that's tomorrow. Tonight at work will be fucked up cuz there's an afternoon baker, a kid really, and he's in from 1am till 5am and then it's me and Necia out front, Necia leaves at 1am when the bakerdude comes in. I dont think he's ever done an open bake before so I have a feeling Im going to be in the back a lot of the night. I should get going. I'm really fucking lonely but the pain is stimulating, like putting your tongue on a 9 volt battery. I thought of something interesting in my sleep, woke up with this on my arm "my life/love/happiness, like money pit, dig think hit something but boards empty boxes boat debris then really think found buried treasure, cave in, flood, fall in, drown" it makes sense to me, very sad tho, think about it if you have to.

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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