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So what's been happening? I had my third ultrasound almost two weeks ago. Cassidy's measuring 19 inches and 5 pounds 11 ounces, these were estimates from the technician. The baby looks a lot like I do in my baby pics, big grin, big nose...and even in black and white I could tell it's got Greg's eyes. His are blue-gray and mine are green-blue. Punnett squares tell me that the baby can't have brown eyes. OH it also has lots of hair, we could see hair floating around on its head. I had an OB appointment the monday after the ultrasound but it was with another doctor from the group. They make you rotate doctors just incase you go into labor and your doctor isnt around. That doctor said that I should come back in two weeks and then the appointments will turn weekly. I told him I thought that I was going to go sooner than what my due date is, which on one report it's listed as Sept 5th, and on another it's as late as mid-September. Babies in the third trimester gain about a pound a week, and unless Im giving birth to a toddler, Im pretty sure it'll happen in the next couple of weeks. Doctors like to ask you all sorts of questions about your period, when the first day of your last cycle was in order to determine a due date, but they dont ask anything about when you might actually have gotten laid... there were two weeks in early december where I was working lots of OT at Hortons and Greg was working six days a week, and this was before we lived together etc, and anyway I'm pretty sure I got pregnant on Thanksgiving. That's when Rick "threw a fit" and kicked/chased us out of the house and we walked through a snow storm to get a motel room. We drank massive amounts of Jack and had a fuckfest at the Ramada.

We still don't know if it's a boy or a girl. At the last ultrasound the lady brought in another person and neither of them could tell, though one of them said something about swollen labia, then the other one said "but they could be testes too" so what the fuck, we dont know. We havent agreed on a spelling yet either. I'd rather stick to something traditional if it's a boy (Cassidy or Cazzidy) and then if it's a girl we can get more creative, but Greg wants to spell it "Kazzity" no matter what. I really dont like the word ZIT being in the name. We've got all the possible spellings on paper and not many of them look good. Kazzidy, Cazzidee, etc.

The shower went well except I only knew two people there. Well, I KNEW people, but they werent my friends or people I'd invited. Not that I have many friends, the real friends are all too far away to come, but still there have been people I see all the time out at karaoke and other bars who always talk about baby and want to be touchin my belly etc and supposedly had all this baby stuff from their roommate's brother's wife's newborn three months ago that they wanted to give me blah blah and none of those people showed up. There were like 10 people like that. I told family members and people actually coming to the shower (my mom's friends) that I had most of the big stuff covered because of all the other girls telling me they had three cribs at their house, would I need one etc, so now we have clothes and toiletries and toys and all kinds of baby shit except for what the baby really needs, like a bassinette, playpen, stroller, car seat and high chair. I also still need a breast pump. And to top all that, my aunt assumed Cassidy was a boy because of the name and put some sort of clip art on the invites saying that it's a boy so much of what we got is boy stuff. Thank god for gift certificates. I have $115 in walmart cash to get things from there. Janet, you gave twice that of any other, and I know you struggle sometimes with your own bills so it means a lot. Also, Greg's mom came to the shower with Pedro and afterwards she said that it looked like we were missing some of the essentials and asked what kinds of big stuff we needed. Still counting on a couple of the girls to come through for me I told her we'd call and let her know. Walmart has a stroller-carseat combination for a little over a hundred, we may get that with the gift cards. Aunt Shirl says Mandy's old crib is upstairs, but it's one of those wooden things from the 50's and I'll need to check the railing spaces and all that.

I've put back on a lot of weight and Im sick of hearing about it from everyone. My aunt sharon was up frpm florida last weekend and she flipped on me for ordering sherbert when we were all out getting ice cream at the lake. She said I shouldn't be ordering anything and that I shouldnt be hungry at all seeing as we just ate lunch (2 slices of pizza three hours prior). I stormed off and my cousin Kelly came after me to apologize for her mom. She said that aunt sharon is only concerned about my health, I told Kelly I didnt need health advice from someone who smokes two packs and eats one "meal" a day. My blood pressure never went up, my cholesterol is fine, I'm no where near diabetic and my asthma has barely returned, and really that's because the baby is packed up against my lungs.... Ive seen that bitch maybe ten times my entire life, like she knows me. I could WALK to piece of shit florida, kick her ass AND walk home.

My brother thinks he's got this weird girl pregnant. She's on SSD cuz of suicide attempts and has lost custody of her other two kids cuz of her craziness and the fact that some guy she had living with her had a dog that attacked both kids, 3 and 6 years old now who knows how old when mauled, and they needed stitches from the attack, she also works part time at mcdonalds... basically your run-of-the-mill girl born n raised in the cultural mecca known as Delaware, Ohio. So my mom is in ohio RIGHT NOW picking them up to bring them to Ny to live here. The kids are coming with her for a week and will then visit one weekend a month. It'll be nice to have my brother around but god dammit, Im the only crazy pregnant bitch this house needs. I try not to judge, maybe her and I have things in common, and she's not an inbred waste of soul like most every native of Delaware.... But between myself and my mom, I think the crazy bitch quota for 53 Dorset drive has been filled.

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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