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I'm not feeling too good right now. Very depressed. And stressed. Haven't even started that 10 pager that's due today. The car was steaming today. And it feels like every joint in my body is slowly rotting away (which is why the call it degenerative arthritis I guess...). I still am unable to fall asleep at night unless Im stoned out of my mind. I was thinking about getting on some sort of sleep aid (I really wanna try to quit smoking pot). I dont think I'll try to get that script, I'd probably take them all. You don't leave fat people alone with cake, you don't leave kids alone with child molesters and you don't leave suicidals alone with sleeping pills.... nuf said on that.

Meanwhile... I'm looking forward to spending some time in Ohio. besides the obvious reason of being closer to friends of higher quality there's also 1) getting away from the drama here, getting away from my mom, and seeing how well I handle Cass without being able to go out at night after she's asleep 2) I think janet and I could really help each other out (Ive noticed the further away from each other we are, the shittier both our lives become), and I'll also be able to help out my brother. 3) visiting/living with someone always makes me more normal, in that I have to put on a show and not be mental in front of other people, over time it starts to not be a front, and it comes naturally.

I want to see about cross registering for the summer because I cant afford to take a break from classes or else I'd have to start working again. I would love to get a job in Ohio but I'd have to work for cash... or just not get a bank account and quit getting food stamps. I dont know. I'm gonna be late for dinner at aunt shirl's, time to wake up Skootch and dress us both in happy faces.

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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