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well the whole atkins thing seems to be going well. we don't own a scale or I'd be able to tell how much I've lost. Originally I didn't wanna weigh myself at all, I'm not doing this cuz I'm too fat, but rather cuz I'm too unhealthy. But Atkins has diagrams and charts and whatnot of how much you should lose by what day of the program, according to how much you already weigh etc etc, so I'm getting paranoid about being behind in the program. Though I don't think I am. I've caught glimpses of myself in mirrors and noticed a small change, my clothes have become a little loose... but I could just be "thinking thin", power of suggestion stuff. The thing I need to be careful of (and don't laugh) is turning from atkins to anorexia. Right now my body is tricked into thinking it's starving, so it's eating itself. Over the weekend I didn't eat much, I went from 5am saturday to 11pm saturday without eating, then what I did eat wasn't much, and then I didn't eat again till sunday night. I wasn't even hungry. My stomach didn't rumble until I had eaten a little, then it was like "oh yeah, this is what I'm supposed to do..." The same thing has been goin on yesterday and today. No breakfast, no lunch, normal atkins sized dinner then I eat another meal later instead of a snack... when one of the main rules of atkins is not to go 6 hours without eating. The last two days realy weren't my fault. I threw up a couple times yesterday and have been a victim of vertigo since. Seems I'm allergic to fiber supplements. Go figure. I was at work for 45 mins yesterday and didn't go at all today. I'll be making up hours though. As for the acquired eating disorder threat, it's very easy to switch over from atkins to an e.d.. I have caught myself thinking unhealthily, shit like "Well if my body is burning its own fat, if I stop eating fat and just eat protein, then my body should eat more of its own fat..." or "If I start taking laxitives, I'll get all the fat out of my body sooner..." yucky. Onto a different topic, I was complaining in the last entry abotu me getting a job and eric getting a truck, and he said "But you can have the Lumina" etc... well he had to take the truck into the dealership already cuz the lock on the driver's side broke. Actually the bar that's part of the lock mechanism fell off. Nice craftsmanship there, eh? THEN he calls me to pick him up at work and drop him off to get the truck from the shop and the lumina won't start. And it sounds and looks like it's more than the serpentine belt needing to be replaced. and it's going to be expensive as hell to fix, and we wont have the money till friday, maybe, thats if it doesnt cost that much to fix. glad I got a job and no way to get there....

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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