Defining Moments of My Life
Ramble On

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Ramble On
09.28.03 3:25 p.m.

Haunted house is rockin. Not as fun as Terror Park but that was an exceptional haunt. I realized I was very spoiled there, but next season I'll be considered a veteran with scream world and will be paid more. Also I'll be able to get in on the design more and hopefully will get my own room, total artistic freedom with my character. He gave me a role to play this year. I'm at the entrance of the 3-D house, I hand out the glasses. It's set up in an Area-51 theme, soldiers and aliens and mad scientists a-plenty. I play a zombie army dude, wear camo and a flak jack and a helmet. I put bullet holes on my forhead and face and am generally bloodied up though I'm going to cut back on the blood from now on because it attracts mosquitos. I'm thinking of putting a peace sign on the helmet as a political statement of sorts. I'm really the only person with lines in all three houses. I drill sergeant them with "You are now entering a top secret military facility! Put these glasses on or your eyes will be in a world of hurt!" I stole the "world of hurt" thing from Gunney (History Channel "Mail Call" Marine-corps dude). I scare about half the people but really I'm not set out to be scary, I'm more of a distraction for the other girl hiding in a closet that scares the bejesus out of people while they are trying to get the glasses to stay on. Everyone in my area is really funny and I think I might even *gasp* make some friends! I miss the cameraderie of TPark , but I'd been there three years and we did stuff sorta year-round. I don't miss the pranks we'd pull on each other though, I like having eyebrows....


Anyway I'm starting to get excited about moving out. Really Eric is just as mental as I am, even moreso cuz first off he's been in therapy for YEARS and second he knows what causes his problems yet he does nothing about them cuz he likes having the excuses, and maybe it's a little bit of laziness/complacency. I used to be like that... "I'm bipolar, I'll never be OK so why bother trying"... etc, that mind-set eventually led me down the road to heroin. It's interesting in that when I stopped seeing myself as being a worthless, fucked-up head case, I stopped being a worthless, fucked up head case... and most of my Bipolar symptoms have remissed. Though when the circumstances are right the levee breaks. Really though, it takes a hell of a lot of bullshit raining down for that to happen.

I have some cool ideas on how to style an apartment. I won't have much furniture, the only "extra" stuff Eric has is a couple papasan chairs. I want to get some bean bags. I could get a whole pile of them for a couch then spread them out for a bed. I have my eyes set on that studio close to Sharpstown. It's in a pretty nice spot for being in that general area cuz everything around it is run down. It's right near a pretty big park too and I plan eventually on getting a bike and riding in that park. I'd also be close enough to bike to work when it's not over 90 (October-February). Course this is all dependant upon me getting a job around that area. The whole night manager of the school thing is still up in the air. I'm not counting on it, though I try not to count on anything really, but my own fingers and toes.... After the haunted house is over I'm going to hit up some temp agencies. I really REALLY want to work overnights. I'm very surprised that the one night job I applied for didn't contact me. They still have their ad up on the Houston net job search place. That was the making copies/blueprints for an architectural firm. I've done shit like that before, and I'd be perfect for the job anyway with all the other things they listed they wanted in an employee/other job responsibilities. Maybe it's best that I didn't get it cuz it may have interfered with school hours when I start up again. I still need to get shit rollin with getting my transcripts to the colleges here. Transferring is a major fucking pain in the ass, and I've switched schools 5 times already.


Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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About Me
I am a bipolar genius, child abuse & addiction survivor, who is now a single mother who works 70 hours a week and has had gastric-bypass weight loss surgery a year ago. Wish me luck cuz I need it!!!

Examples of My Insanity
Dead On Mental Health Quiz
Tuna Noodle Casserole Story
Explaining Myselves
Biting Off Redneck's Finger
Got So Crazy Scratched Til I Bled
How I Found Nirvana
Leaving Lon After 7 Years
Bad Luck On 3 July 4ths
Random Craziness (FBI Please Disregard)
How I Ended Up A Junky
Almost Getting Raped by a Marine
Typical Weekend in Ohio
How Cobain Saved My Life


How long could we maintain? I wondered. How long until one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so, well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere, 'cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency and they'll run us down like dogs. Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?


AFTER


WHAT'S MY NAME?!?