Defining Moments of My Life
Death Camps for Alarm Clocks

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Death Camps for Alarm Clocks
11.21.03 11:12 a.m.

I had things to say a second ago but now I dont remember. Oh yeah, I was dreaming. I was in NY, my bro in Ohio. We kept missing each other. I'd drive there to see him, end up getting high. He'd be on his way to NY to stop me from going to OH. The dream was in the past, when I was trying to stay clean and trying to get high all at the same time. It seemed something relevant was going to happen and something important to tell my brother but when I managed to meet up with him I woke up before we found a decent place to talk. The car needed tires before it could be driven back to NY. We could get tires or get drugs, but not both. Then came the decision between what I wanted and what I needed, and that blurry line that defines "want" and "need". I remember one of his buddies (growing up, Prett couldn't ever remember anyone's name, they were always Buddy), dressed in drag, and was kinda hot, red-haired wig on. He was going to seduce the mechanic into giving us free tires or something but then the shop closed and we all had to pile into Prett's Jeep. I never got to tell him what I needed to say, the alarm clock woke me up. The first "rational" thought this morning was that whenever I rule the world there will be no more alarm clocks. I'll make a society where time doesn't matter. Then a vision popped into my head, a death camp for alarm clocks. Great band name too... but I already have a short movie in my head. Clocks being herded into the ghetto, then later running from abusive guards who are out to steal all their accessories (dials, hands, numbers, batteries, etc). You see box-cars full of clocks heading toward the alarm clock death camp, and they get straight off the train, dogs barking at them, and go into the showers where you hear them getting all smashed up. It goes silent except for the ticking of one clock, who then gets beat again and the ticking stops. Great movie. I'd do it in claymation to lighten up the mood and to thrwart the naysayers who will say any movie depicting a death camp is wrong. Maybe I'll look into really making this movie. I've been thinking that I need to get an easel for the apartment. I can have one whole room set aside for my artmaking.


Speaking of the apartment, I haven't heard anything from thm yet and I'm starting to get nervous. I ended up paying that OSU bill yesterday so all the money I'd saved up is gone. I could borrow against the money Eric has for my three months of rent. He's got $1,700 in his savings. There's so much stuff I need for the apartment that it's easier to list what I DO have: futon, computer desk, bookcase, coffee maker, silverware, 2 towels, cd player, goerge foreman grill, small cookie sheet and muffin tin, my guitar and an old amp. I need a dresser and hangers. I need a bed or matress. I saw any size down comforters on sale for $50. That would double as mattress and blanket. I need a couch or some chairs, I need a kitchen table and chairs. I need a couple pillows and pillow cases. I need a vaccuum and other cleaning supplies. End tables and coffee tables. I would like a huge flat top desk to do my collages and comic strips on. I picked up a Greensheet last night (swapmeet newspaper), need to see if anything good is in there.


Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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About Me
I am a bipolar genius, child abuse & addiction survivor, who is now a single mother who works 70 hours a week and has had gastric-bypass weight loss surgery a year ago. Wish me luck cuz I need it!!!

Examples of My Insanity
Dead On Mental Health Quiz
Tuna Noodle Casserole Story
Explaining Myselves
Biting Off Redneck's Finger
Got So Crazy Scratched Til I Bled
How I Found Nirvana
Leaving Lon After 7 Years
Bad Luck On 3 July 4ths
Random Craziness (FBI Please Disregard)
How I Ended Up A Junky
Almost Getting Raped by a Marine
Typical Weekend in Ohio
How Cobain Saved My Life


How long could we maintain? I wondered. How long until one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so, well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere, 'cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency and they'll run us down like dogs. Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?


AFTER


WHAT'S MY NAME?!?