**REGISTER TO VOTE ONLINE!** **SIGN DARFUR ACTION PETITION HERE!!**

---

Well, it�s been a while since I wrote. I�ve been kinda busy lately� (BIG GRIN)

You know how I�ve always said that if I ever had kids I�d have the only boy in kindergarten with a mohawk? I�m almost 100% sure that I�ve met the daddy. Not that kids would be anything happening soon, but you know what I mean. I�ll try to keep this entry shorter than that last one but I�ll fill you in on how everything has been going this week.

Monday afternoon, after cleaning out the filthy crawlspace, I showered and went over to my Aunt Shirl�s cuz Aunt Sue and Heather are up from Florida. Did the family thing all night. Almost everyone heard about my lucky fourth of july, either from my mouth or word-of-mouth. Heather and I hung out all night. Talked at Shirl�s till 11pm then went to Denny�s for more gab (we were keeping everyone up). The talk at Denny�s consisted of her bitching about her crappy job, me explaining why I moved back, and then girls talking about boys, especially really cute boys with Mohawks�. I was trying to get a more experienced opinion on whether or not I should call him or wait for him to call me etc. Anyway, after Denny�s we went to the cemetery where our grampa is buried, that was like 2am by then and hung out there until it started to rain harder. Talked in the car, listening to The Eminem Show cd over and over, until about 4am, then crawled our tired asses into bed. Tuesday we got my aunt shirl�s car to go visit gramma. Heather�s kid, Brittney, had spiffy sunglasses that Heather wanted to try to find at the dollar store so that was out first stop. Coming out of the dollar store I noticed my phone was blinking, one missed call from Geoffrey. I jumped up and down and squealed like a school girl. Amazing. He was off work still, I thought from the holiday but it was cuz he was on a 5 day suspension, said he had a killer time with me, asked if I thought he wasn�t going to call, I said �something like that�, asked what I was doing later on. He was doing yardwork and whatnot around the property and house but wanted me to call him in a few hours. We visited gramma, me with a sappy grin on my face the whole time, gramma asked what I was so happy about and Heather said that a boy called me. I told gram how I met him at the fireworks that night after leaving the euchre game with her. She asked if I fucked him already (gram uses words like that�) and I said �hell yeah�, all of us cracked up but gramma, �you better have used a rubber� etc. That night I snagged my mom�s van and me and heather went out to his place. We didn�t get there till late though cuz she wanted to go tanning first and she�s a lot like my mom in that it takes her about 3 hours to make up her mind to do something and then another 3 hours to get off her ass and do it. So I said we�d be over in a half hour and and hour and a half later we got over there. A little bit of the delay was my fault. While Heather was in tanning I ran over to the drug store for some Nair. They had this other shit on sale so I tried that. Went into the bathroom at the tanning place, got it on my legs, waited the said 4 minutes and then my legs started to BURN, like insane acid-like feeling. I tried to get the shit off my legs but all they had in the bathroom was tp and those brown paper towels. I packed my shit up and got to the van, called gram on my cell, she lives right near there, and said �Gram my legs are burning from some lotion I need your shower ASAP!� She had the door open ready for me. Got the shit off my legs and it only half-assed took the hair off! What the shit! So we get over to Geoff�s and I gotta explain what happened, only slightly embarrassed. We pick him up, loaded up a shit load of beer bottles, all of which he said accrued over the 5 day �holiday� (we talked more about that later, he has cut WAY back since meeting me), went to the bottle redemption place, went to the grocery store cuz Heather wanted wine and I got a 22 of Smirnoff Black, they didn�t have OE 40s for him so we went to a gas station for that. When I got gas there he came out and took the pump out of my hand, opened the van door for me to get back in, �Here, let me do that�� Since being with him, I�ve been learning more about how a real man acts. With Harlan, he only thought he knew his role, the same with me. It�s different with Geoff. He�s polite, the only person I�ve met that�s as thoughtful and full of common courtesy as I am (hey, fuck you, I AM courteous), he�s all in all, a decent human being. �Most of the time� he said. He�s also said �There are two sides to every story and you�re only hearing mine, you haven�t heard hers� when talking about his shitty marriage, his side of the story paints her as a very sick, drug addicted bitch. He�s also said �I�m like Jekkyl and Hyde when I drink, you haven�t met Mr. Hyde yet.� Anyway, we went back to his house to drink. OH, while at the bottle return place he ran into a friend from rehab and introduced me, then yanked the guys shirt sleeve up to reveal a tat of �smiley guy�, the NIRVANA sappy face with the X�d out eyes, and above it said ENDLESS and below NAMELESS (hidden track on the Nevermind album, minus the first 50,000 copies) . Then he grabbed my wrist and shoved it in his friend�s face, and we were both like �kickass�. Guy�s name is Mark. Haven�t had a chance to hang with him yet but most likely will. So we go back to Geoff�s and drink out on his back patio. He gets his acoustic and sings some of his songs. He�s like Dave Grohl in that he writes a song on acoustic then takes it to electric and rocks the fuck out of it to the point where you barely recognize the song, and both versions are very good. So he serenades Heather and I for a few hours. We keep tossing hints to Heather about us wanting to be alone� finally she gets hungry and I call in a carryout order for her at Dennys. I took her back to aunt shirls and we went back to Geoff�s house. Upstairs for talk, very deep, often sad talk. I was going through some serious mania earlier in the week and this was the border night where the depression was creeping in and my moods were back and forth. I amazed him by crying and laughing at the same time, genuinely feeling both emotions simultaneously. Lots of talk, and then he said �enough of this, let me cheer you up�, we�d make out or fool around for a little bit then wind up talking again or me crying a little again. Finally got around to having sex, it was quick though, he said he was really tired, staying up all night (convo like that is tiresome too though) also all the yard work and drinking he did that day, he admitted to having three glasses of jack n coke before I came over to calm his nerves. We dozed for a short time but seeing I was supposed to have the van back at my mom�s house by 4am and it was now 5:10 I thought it might be wise to get going. He said the roommate that drives him to work never made it home so he needed a ride though didn�t want to trouble me making my responsibility. He explained for the first time, about his 5 day suspension, and that was his first day back and how they were prolly gonna fire him anyway�. No, no attitudes like that, get dressed, I�ll get you there. Coffee and Jedi Mind Trick will get you through the day. I fucked up and had left the cell phone on the back patio all night and when I checked it, it said 11 missed calls. YIKES! I called mom and she didn�t bitch, just said to get my ass home NOW and hung up on me. To that, I had to call her back and add �I need a favor� can I borrow the van for today cuz his ride never showed and it�s really important he get to work�� and holy crap she said yes. So we got mom. He was making fun that I was going light on the brakes, you know, that pedal next to the gas� and I said �there�s another pedal??� then said �wait till my mom takes over driving, shit�� And I was right, mom was bat-outta-hell fast to work, like 75 mph on the back roads. Geoff meanwhile was nervous as all fucking hell with his ballcap pulled down on his head, hiding in the middle row of seats�. We had talked through the night about our shitty bitch-ass mother�s and then I seriously piss mine off and THEN he has to meet her. I told him she�d be all rainbows and pony rides for him though cuz that�s how she works the fa�ade. She didn�t bitch that it was on E, she filled the tank in fact. I took Geoff to work, we were actually 20 minutes early so we stopped for coffee and chilled in the car for a while. I dragged my ass back to aunt shirls and up to bed. He was adamant about me getting some sleep (so beavis mode would go away) and I was adamant about him staying awake and having a good day. �I�m going to have a lousy day!� �It�s only 5am, how do you know how the next 19 hours are gonna be� teaching him Jedi Mind Tricks, how to outsmart oneself and undo years of negative thinking� which of course doesn�t happen over night, but all morning like when the gas station attendant rung up his coffee and told him to have a great day I said �don�t worry he will� and when he got out of the van to go I said �have a good day� and he said �I�ll try� and I said �No, you WILL.� I got a weak smile like �I hope you�re right.� He called a few times that day to make sure I was sleeping, didn�t make much sense to me either. It was rainy and blah, I slept till 1pm then lounged the rest of the day. I�d left my tongue ring on his night stand and I needed to get it that night. Heather and I went to visit her half0sister, she said for only a few minutes and we were there for three hours, then heather wanted to tan, and THEN I got over to see Geoff at 10:30. Britt was with us and she was anxious to get to meet him cuz Heather had told everyone how damn cute he was. Well, he had been asleep since 8pm cuz of the whole day prior with the yard work, talking all night, working all day with no sleep. We still haven�t caught up but will this weekend. I went up to get my t. ring and he was sound asleep, tried to wake up for me, ended up laying down next to him for 5 minutes. Seriously did not want to leave. He didn�t come down stairs, though asked if I wanted him to, I said he�d meet the family �soon enough�. We talked about my mom, he asked if I�d gotten yelled at too much and I said �No, actually she called my cell after I dropped you off and told me that you�re lucky you�re so cute.� Geoff is kinda shy, humble, doesn�t have the esteem like my inflated ego so when I tell him how sexy he is, etc, he blushes. So I let him sleep, me and heather n britt went to taco bell and took it back to aunt shirl�s house. I went to bed around 1 am, was up by 6:55. Felt rested enough. OH, the last time we had sex, the �quickie�, I didn�t get to cum, and we�d gotten to talking more and neither of us could focus, so all night in bed after taco bell I was thinking about him, making myself horny and what not, and then I hear these moans coming from my uncle in the bedroom underneath the one I was in. EWWW, I was sure they were getting it on, as if I haven�t been traumatized enough by these people for christ sakes�. It was hard falling asleep to that. When I went downstairs in the morning my aunt says that uncle rob hurt his ribs the night before, thinks they were broken. A friend of his was found dead on his porch, missed a golf game then didn�t answer the phone for a day then someone went to the house and the dude was blue and in a pool of dried blood on the porch, musta fallen, bumped head, passed out and bled to death, lovely� so my uncle and the rest of the guys got all shit faced that night, Pete Moss judo chopped uncle rob and sent him chest first onto a coffee table, which was handcrafted and didn�t bust under his weight so his ribs ended up busting instead. He gave me a twenty to go get food for breakfast, I made breakfast tacos, enough to feed 15 but three ended up eating� while doing the dishes he asked if I�d drive him to the ERR. Right as I said yes my phone wrung and it was Geoff. He had a court hearing preliminary divorce crap that morning and it being 10 am and the court was for 11 am I knew he had a problem, �Need a ride� lemme see what I can do� so I dropped uncle rob off at immediate care, picked up and dropped off Geoff, then swung back for uncle rob, immediate care wasn�t open till 1pm, OOPS. Ran errands for my mom when she brought the van to me at shirls at lunchtime. I picked Geoff up and he ran all the errands with me. I had an ingenious idea that morning, Geoff works on houses for a living, actually getting them ready for market sale, which is what we�re doing with mom and rick�s house� and she was talking of hiring someone to finish the crap we�re too lasy to do, so I called her and said Geoff would do it I�m sure. So I made a list of all the shit needing work still and brought Geoff over to check it out, he said there wasn�t anything on the list he wasn�t confident about. Very cool. Mom said she�d toss a few hunnerd. Yeah, and I been doin it for nada. So she�s camping all this weekend and I�m here with Geoff. Now how do I get rid of Rick�. Not that any of the fucking beds in this house are big enough for two to sleep on, they�re all twins, but I think we�ll manage *something*. After running errands and picking up gramma, (�I thought your brother was in Ohio� she said referencing the mohawk �Hey at least he doesn�t have all that shit in his face like Prett�) we went back to aunt shirls. He was blown away by the cd collection, I told him it used to be twice that but I left half for Lon. I explained my situation with Lon to him and He said Lon seemed like a nice guy who couldn�t get his shit together, that he used to be like that, I said I still sort of am but I�ve come a long way. We wer elistening to the cure up in mandy�s old bedroom, door wide open� only up there so we wouldn�t bug everybody with the music, aunt shirl got home and flipped because I was in the bedroom with a boy� SERIOUSLY, we got yelled at, Geoff said he felt like he was in middle school again, ditto. The WHOLE family went out to eat last night, and I told Geoff, �You know how I said I�m a nice person and I don�t intentionally hurt people, well this dinner will be the most pain I�ll ever intentionally put you through�. I tried to warn him but when the waitress started taking drink orders with my gramma going first �and what would you like to drink mam?� �A SCREWDRIVER!� she said all pissed off, demanding sounding, he woulda had drink coming out his mose if we�d had our drinks by then. Geoff was on the end of the table, on my right, with gramma on his right. Robbie was on my left btw, very symbolic positioning. I didn�t clue Geoff in to who Robbie was �Oh he was THAT cousin� but you talked to him� and was NICE to him�and EVERYONE at that table knows what happened?!?!?!?!?!� After dinner I got aunt shirl to drop me off at his place while she took gramma home. Heather was spozed to pick me up when she went tanning but she never went then when I called her she was asleep so Geoff said I should stay and could crash after he left for work and get a ride whenever. His roomie got us way baked, and both her and I have been limiting the weed so we were pretty assed out by the time jeopardy was over and we went upstairs. Didn�t start fooling around till 10, and that was only kissing. He asked how come I�m never tired, I explained I do get tired but my body is full of boundless energy, I�m the energizer bunny�. We snuggled, had a tickle fight, (finally someone more ticklish than me! Wait now you all know my weakness�) We talked a little bit and fell asleep. He apologized for the lack of lovins and I said not to worry cuz I�m pretty much horny all the fucking time and I�m used to going unsatisfied, he promised to get me unused to it. I remember the alarm going off and him slipping out of bed, but don�t remember him showering or coming back into the room to change and what not. He woke me up leaning over me kissing my eyes till I opened them . �Mornin, sunshine� I gotta get going�� Took him five minutes to actually go though cuz he was kissing me, then he�d get up, get halfway to the door �one more�� that happened 4 times, he;d get to the door, �oh I forgot something�� then he came over and kissed me some more. Seriously, this is how sappy we are. It�s so fucking beautiful. I�m still convinced that I�m actually in a coma, or that I overdosed partying back in Houston, and this is my brain�s way of taking my mind off of it, like that old Twilight Zone set in the old west with the cowboy being hanged and the rope breaks and he flats down stream meets a beautiful woman gets away from the hangmen and lives happily ever after� then it shows him grab his throat and it cuts to real life where he�s still on the rope, feet turning just like the Native�s in Brave New World, the whole episode was a dying man�s fantasy. I�m still convinced that�s what�s going on here. It�s too perfect. Things like this don�t happen to me. Maybe it was time, maybe I�m ready now, I�ve made changes, I know how to respect love. This is a test, not a dream.

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

last :: next