Defining Moments of My Life
yeehaw jihad

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yeehaw jihad
06.26.04 7:53 p.m.

Well I had either 9 or 11 darvocets last night. I totally missed the shadow people and went straight to La-La Land. I watched ALL THREE Lord of the Rings consecutively but I only remember like the first third of the Two Towers.... I don't even remember starting up the third one but it was out of the case and in the play station. I think they may have been fucked up copies, my mom bought them when she was in singapore for her job and they're bootleg copies. The words didn't match their mouths, or else the words would speed up and they'd sound like chipmunks and the action would feel like slow motion. Also sometimes the movie would speed up and the words wouldn't. I don't think it was the pills cuz they wouldn't have kicked in by that time. I took 3 for starters then 2 every 20 minutes until I forgot to take more (which is where the cut off point is) that was somewhere towards the end of the first movie I think, hence the 9 or 11.... I don't know why I do these things to myself. I guess it's better than doing mean things to other people. Maybe that's why I treat myself like shit, cuz there's no one else around to mistreat. Oh I need to find a nice codependant boy again so I can push him around and suck the life out of him like all the rest. Dandy of a mood I'm in today. I'm trying to remember why I came back here.... OK, I took gramma to see Shrek 2 today. She asked if I wanted to spend the night. Maybe I should have. But if I'm gonna be bored and moody and lonly, I'd rather be alone. Oh god, there's a graduation party in the adjoining backyard and they're playing ABBA, please, for the love of allah someone take me hostage and cut my head off with a dull, rusty hacksaw! You don't know how serious I am.


Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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About Me
I am a bipolar genius, child abuse & addiction survivor, who is now a single mother who works 70 hours a week and has had gastric-bypass weight loss surgery a year ago. Wish me luck cuz I need it!!!

Examples of My Insanity
Dead On Mental Health Quiz
Tuna Noodle Casserole Story
Explaining Myselves
Biting Off Redneck's Finger
Got So Crazy Scratched Til I Bled
How I Found Nirvana
Leaving Lon After 7 Years
Bad Luck On 3 July 4ths
Random Craziness (FBI Please Disregard)
How I Ended Up A Junky
Almost Getting Raped by a Marine
Typical Weekend in Ohio
How Cobain Saved My Life


How long could we maintain? I wondered. How long until one of us starts raving and jabbering at this boy? What will he think then? This same lonely desert was the last known home of the Manson family; will he make that grim connection when my attorney starts screaming about bats and huge manta rays coming down on the car? If so, well, we'll just have to cut his head off and bury him somewhere, 'cause it goes without saying that we can't turn him loose. He'd report us at once to some kind of outback Nazi law enforcement agency and they'll run us down like dogs. Jesus, did I say that? Or just think it? Was I talking? Did they hear me?


AFTER


WHAT'S MY NAME?!?