**REGISTER TO VOTE ONLINE!** **SIGN DARFUR ACTION PETITION HERE!!**

---

Gary and Cinta typed up a pretty funny entry this morning but they were wrestling over the keyboard and the entry got erased. They were super-pissed, and I laughed cuz it wasn�t happening to me for a change. Which is a reason I laugh at a lot of things come to think of it.

Tonight is the Genundawa Festival. I�m counting on Aunt Linda lending the van to Gary so we can get some trees and participate in the festival. Anything involving fire is cool, and a ring of fire going for MILES around a lake is mucho cool. I don�t have flares yet. Lighting is 9pm starting from Bare Hill, then around in a circle so we�d need to be near the start of the ring for me to get to work on time. I�d like to be out at the farmhouse actually, more shit to drop off for Geoff.

Talked with Tabs. She�s getting a new car, trading in the one still leaking crap all over the driveway that �Nubs� (what I�ve taken to calling Bebop the no tailed cat) rolled around in until I hosed off the driveway AND the cat (that was kinda fun actually, shhh). We spoke of Gary getting a part time job or something while living with us. I talked to Gary about this and he says he doesn�t even want to really take care of kids, that he doesn�t mind sometimes but not to be THE ONE, like it�s his JOB. He also wants to work full time and not part time so I don�t fucken know what�s gonna happen with that situation. We all can still live together, though I was thinking it might be too much partying, too much risk getting raided by cops, and all the drama that goes on with those people. I guess homeless people cant really complain about their future roommates, huh?

Oh, get this happy horseshit, my next day off is next weekend. Yeah it�s nice to have a weekend off but not if I have to work 8 nights in a row to get it off, fucken-a what the fuck� and I tell her �ya got me working like a week straight, no wait� MORE than that�� and she says �There isn�t a law against that is there, it�s not in the same pay period�.� Which is another complaint I have cuz working however many consecutive days and I never seem to get any overtime. �Whatever, get your degree and shut the fuck up� For most having a degree isn�t that much help in job searches but for me having the experience I have with teaching already and ESL and GED being not so structured as public schools, you don�t have to be certified (which wouldn�t be that hard to get either) and there are markets (California, Texas, Florida, NYC) that pay $20 - $40 an hour for ESL teachers. Getting out of poverty is my next goal, I got the psycho thing under control (LOL), got on and off smack (both were goals), lost weight (still ongoing�) and now I need to work on that whole being poor bullshit. I don�t care enough about money, don�t respect it cuz it�s always been the enemy, something mythical that other people experienced. It�s one of those abstract things like time and god that I�d like to pretend don�t exist but it�s only much trouble when I think that way. I�ve been poor longer than I�ve been mental, drugged up, fat� it�s gonna take some work, planning but first understanding and gathering information. I don�t know if I can get myself out of the debt I gathered up while with Lon, I�m pretty sure bankruptcy is still my only way out. I don�t even know who I owe money to or how much. I know something will happen for me to get lots of money, like working now and then moving to cali making better money, doing the bankruptcy at that point when I can make payments and pay a lawyer instead of doing it myself, then once the bankruptcy is cleared I can concentrate on saving good money, I need to figure out how long people can still come sue me for shit or if doing the bankruptcy clears me of that threat. When can I have a car in my name, buy a computer? What happens if someone finishes a bankruptcy and then wins the lotto? I wont ever win the lotto but say I get something published, comics or poetry or holy shit maybe I get off my ass and submit some of my CRATES of writings to a publisher (Palaniuk�s BORING & NORMAL compared to me) and get a book deal. Or myself having the voice of Chris Cornell for starters and the stage presence of Cobain-Morrison-Lydia Lunch, maybe I'll get a band together or something. This may all seem far-fetched, but you need to take my track record into account. Everything in my life has been extreme, getting out of the Vietnamese tiger pit of my childhood makes everything else cake, slight PTSD like any other POW/long term hostage survivor, but cake nonetheless. Look what I've accomplished so far, tip of the `burg. Terry Anderson, Ken on Jeopardy, Lance Armstrong, The Energizer Bunny. My acceptance speech will go something like this: "That's right, what's my name? Say it... Say it again... Louder... Spell it bitches!"

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

last :: next