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Things change so quickly.... I've learned from past relationships about how men can magically transform into almost exactly what you want them to be, seemingly overnight, and then turn back into a pumpkin just as easily.

I picked Greg up from work last night. Being Tuesday, I knew we were headed for the Farmer's cuz it's dollar draft night. At first he's in a bad mood, and he's not talking to me. I try for some conversation but he's feigning interest in the ESPN NCAA class B basketball scores on the muted tv. He tells me he's going to the other end of the bar, but he says it in a way that means "and you're not invited". I dont know if that was intentional or not. As usual and especially on Tuesdays cuz everybody is so thoroughly drunk by the time I get there, people were really pissing me off that night. All the nutjob women were in there, they usually are, really no even halfway mediocre woman would be caught dead in this bar. But last night the real loonies came out. Greg was down at the other end of the bar for some time, I couldnt see where he was sitting or what he was doing cuz it was so crowded. I leaned back far enough finally and he was laughing it up with Nicole, his ex. "OK, maybe he's buttering her up trying to get weed offa her..." but ten minutes later he's STILL talking to her. So now I'm feigning interest in the sports scores while the bats flock around me. One of them asks why Im not drinking, I tell her Im pregnant and she says "Well where's Greg then?" and I said he was at the other end of the bar talking to his ex. She says not for long and runs down there but he wasnt next to Nicole anymore, he'd switched seats with Rick so that Rick was between him and Nicole. OK whatever, enough's enough... I ask if he wants to play a game of darts, he plays thee with me. On the completion of each game I'm abotu to ask him "So are you coming over or going to your place" but I know he's coming over cuz he always does on Tuesdays and he never does on wednesdays at the end of the month cuz he has to pay his rent and then I have to work early friday and saturday so of course he'd be coming over Tuesday... but the way he's been acting I start to wonder and every time I'd be about to ask he'd say "What game do you want to play next" and he seemed really interested in spending time with me. Of course he was, cuz he had no intention of spending the night with me. As we were leaving he whispered something to McLane, a guy he works with, a friend I guess if alcoholics have friends... and I could tell Greg was planning on going there afterwards cuz McLane had bought a 12 pack to go. We were headed toward the car, with Rick in tow, and the most nutty bitch of them all that evening follows him to the car. She was thinking of getting in and then was like "nuh uh Im not getting stuck at yoru place" and Rick was like "Youre not invited to my place, do you need a ride to YOUR house??" I didnt even want her in my car. Greg say it as his opportunity to ditch me, he does this sometimes, uses really lame excuses cuz he needs them cuz he's too much of a pussy to say what he wants/feels.... So he says "if she gets in the car Im walking" and he starts to get otu of the car and I said she wasnt even getting in the car but he says he's walking anyway and I said that I thought he was coming over and he said that he never said he was so why would I think that... and I said fuck you then gimmee my weed (I bought some kid a beer for a bowlfull) so he gets all huffy abotu this and I say "yeah Im gonna buy you weed so you can go off and smoke it without me" (I havent been smoking hardly any, but still if Im buying him weed it's for him to enjoy in my company not to take away and go somewhere else with it). So he throws the cigarette wrapper on the floor, slams the door and starts walking to his house. I speed off, only my brake doesnt work and the front tires are WORSE in the snow than the ones I had on the car before so I'm all over the road and Rick says to let him out too. I drive to Gregs house and wait on the porch for him. He said "Ya need something" like a total dick and I said "some time with you" and he said "Im going inside, getting a few beers and going back down to McLane's house, Im sure he wouldnt kick you out if you showed up." which means "you can follow me if you want to but Im nto riding with you". I say to him that Im going to file for child support in the morning, he said to do what I have to do. I drove back to the house to get the paternity papers and his 12 pack. I was sure he'd sign them and then I could hand him his beer and say "here's your consolation prize" but that didnt happen. When I first got there I sat near him and showed him the papers and he kept saying not now. For the next hour I tried. Finally everybody there woke up McLane's wife or whoever (also three school age kids upstairs sleeping too... real nice for people to go there and party huh?) so I get Rick to head out. Rick tries to talk Dick into euchre and breakfast over at the house cuz it was seeming like Greg was gonna come over. Dick wasnt going anywhere, and Greg said he wasnt leaving the party yet. Which is totally rude to both me and McLane's whoever she is. She's the type of woman who only hints at things but doesnt think she has the right to tell her man what to do... she she couldnt say "please get the fuck out"... so Greg took advantage of that. The paperwork was still at his feet and he still refused to sign it "I need to be sober to read what Im signing" I showed it to him it says "father's signature" and I was like "did you or did you nto knock me up? easy question, if yes then sign the line." he said "I dont know, did I knock you up?" meaning "I think or hope the kid isnt mine" I had the 12 pack in my hand and smacked him with it. I was aimign for his head but it hit his knee and chest cuz he ducked up into a ball when he saw it coming, I kicked the beer out of his hand, was aiming for his face again but he had his hands in the way. Beers all over the floor, spilled beer all over him, and McLane says "I think you need to get the fuck outta my house" but I was already halfway through the door.

I went to child support services today to get an appointment, they dont really do it like that, they have applications but none printed so I need to come back later... yeah really helpful I know. I have an appointment for food stamps on Monday so Ill talk to them about what they were telling me with going after him for support. The CSS people said that I dont get support until the birth of the baby but the offices downstairs, the welfare peolpe were the ones that told me they go after money at 4 mos preggo. Someone's misinformed or theyre we trying to deter me from signing up for benefits. Either way I'll figure things out monday.

I need to get going, though I have more to say. I called into work earlier to tell them I forgot to put in a time off request for that Monday, same day as my next doc appnt, and bossman yells "Wait tell her I need to talk to her" fuck, I know what he's gonna ask me... cuz the psycho bitch that lied about being pregnant has been calling in every night this week, and bossman has had to work like 20 hour days cuz NO ONE will work nights. He asked if Id work 10-2 or else 2-6. 10-2 wpi;da been better for sleep reasons but I need to see Greg before I go in, he gets off work at 11:30, Im gonna confront him at the bar, maybe stab him, I dunno, before I go into work. 2-8 is easy, no customers, though Im supposed to be back in at noon-3pm tomorrow but he said he'd find someone to cover for me which really means I'll be working 2am till 3pm tomorrow.....

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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