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Wow, I'm sober today but still out of it. I'm pretty sure my brain is bleeding or something, it's kinda swollen and throbbing. Oy vey!

Heather got hoem from work last night a lil after midnight yelled at Kevin for bein drunk, yelled at me for gettin him drunk and then asked if I wanted to go across the street for a couple drinks. Hell yeah!! So she bought me one, then Casey Vogt, a girl I used to go to school with here, she's got a twin tracy and I can still tell them apart... well she came up to me and was like "Joey c'mere I got $5 on you...!" I get over to her group of peeps and there's a guy who I used to be in the basement with at the evil babysitters, Frankie Mullins, (side note I do believe he burnt down his house and killed or severely maimed his lil sis back in the day. good times in that basement baby) I had run into Frankie at Heather's gas station earlier that day, we caught eyes and he had that look of possibly remembering me, or knowing he shoulda known me etc, but as I dont really care for chitchat unless Im drunk I didnt say anything then. So casey's like "Show them your license, he doesnt believe your name is Joey" So Casey bought me a drink for that then frankie bought me a drink in apology, then Mike fucken Carter shows up, the kid I grew up next door to, had tree forts n shit with you know wiffle ball and hide n seek. We shot the shit for a while and I met some other people I used to know. The only thing that coulda made it better is if they had karaoke. Which they do, on Wednesdays and every other Saturday or some shit. I'm probably moving in here at my moms so the karaoke across the street will be nice.

The last day of class, Sherrie our nurse teacher lady, was showing up how to change colostomy bags and how to take care of stomas. A stoma is when you're too old to poop the right way anymore so they cut yr intestines and bring em up through your abdomen to the outside, there arent any nerves in the intestine but the outside skin around the stoma gets irratated so we have to put guaze and bandages there. In order to do this we have to measure the diameter of the stoma so we can cut a hole in the bandage. ANYWAY Sherrie pulled out this thing

and put it around the stoma to measure it. She had a few of these large index cards thingies, they fold up in fourths and can be slipped into scrub pockets or in the pocket of a residents' chart etc. I started laughing right away and she was like "Uh oh, what's so funny Jo?" and I said "Can I have an extra one of those for my wallet?" She said "I'm afraid to ask why but I have to know" "Well," I said "I'm not even gonna ask the boys what their names are anymore, I'm just gonna pull that out of my wallet and say 'Point to it!'" The WHOLE class fucking died! And she gave me one of the indexes. Kevin saw me scanning it and he asked what it was and I told him the story and he said "Oh so it's a Peter Meter!" I'm gonna mass-market them, I'll be a women's lib hero!

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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