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Aside from still being a little drunk from the rodeo last night, things are better. Rodeo sucked (go fig, it's in NY... why even bother?) plus it was $15 to get in. I figured there'd be a carnival or something else goin on, but nope, just retarded rednecks on ugly horses chasing down baby cows. I got way too drunk. Didn't eat much all day, some homemade nachos but I was drinking at the same time so really I only ate a few chips. Somehow though, I managed to puke all over my pillow as soon as I put my head down on it. It was like food stuff too, not whiskey coming up. It was very weird. I ate a few nacho chips with beef n cheese on em, only a few, and that was HOURS earlier, does the stuff come back through my intestines & pouch-tummy?? Ugh yuck! Now I understand why they said not to drink alcohol after having a gastric bypass... you cant drink beer cuz of the foam and the carbonation (really it hurts me to drink anything carbonated), then you cant find a limit for the hard stuff, you're always drinking on an empty stomach, plus you're missing a third of the intestines used to absorb the alcohol... so it hits all at once. I drank most of a 1.75 (almost a 2 liter) bottle of whiskey yesterday between 6pm and 10 pm. Today my liver is swollen. Enough's enough.

Scott and I "kissed and made up" on wednesday. Maybe "that" was the problem all along, lol. Anyway he REALLY REALLY needed some smoke and none of his loser friends around here could find him any. Two of them grow the shit, all of them smoke EVERY DAY yet they cant find any??? The one guy was like "I havent bought any in a few days, I wouldnt even know who to call n ask." um...? I just gave Scott a look like "we better go else I'm gonna end up disrespectin your friend" dude how bout callin anybody and everybody in town you ever smoked with, gee I dont know. I FUCKING HATE SMALL TOWNS.

But somethign good came out of it, I got Scott to go to Canandaigua with me to find some. He was all like "Im not goin all the way there on a maybe" He doesnt know me well enough I guess, well really he knows the me that's here, not the me when I'm there. Right after walking in the pick I found smoke while waiting to get Scott a beer. Well I said somethin to Trell and then he said he'd ask around then he noticed the kid in line behind me and was "hey you got, this chick here is lookin" and the guy was like "yeah lemme finish this beer" which took him FOREVER, then he had to find his bookbag, oh it's in his friend's car, and that friend went to a different bar, he needs to find the keys after he finishes this beer, oh hahaha funny thing he had the keys the whole time... so an hour after the kid tellin me and me tellin Scott then we were ready to go. Well Scott was ready to go, but I dragged him down to karaoke, it was late and Scott really wanted to go home so I only sang once. My voice was goin out on me anyway cuz of riding in the Monte with the windows down having to yell all the way there. The trailer peeps were there, Butters, Crissy, Heather, Rob (an ex)... Rob avoided me at first and felt awkward I'm sure but after a while we all went to the trailer and smoked together, plus Dale, their guy on the couch. Rob was on his way out the door and he said he left a drink at the bar, he's gonna go slam it and be back to talk to me, said he was sorry for what happened, it wasn't his fault, it was other people blah blah blah. I said "no, trust me, IT'S ALRIGHT, really, everything worked out well..." head nod towards Scott "Well I still wanna talk, I owe you an explanation." Which is more than any other guy has tried to do for me after a break up. Anyway I didnt stick around for the chat. Not that I didnt miss my "friends", but the trailer was in serious shambles, smelled like rotting garbage and dog shit (prolly cuz of all the rotting garbage and dog shit all over the place...) good thing Scott was W-A-S-T-E-D by this point or else his OCD and his hoity-toitiness would have been a deadly combination.

Everybody loved the car. I love that fucken car. I told Scott I'd start paying him for it. He still owes $10,200 on it! Can I cover a $400 a month car payment? if I get in at the VA then most def. Finally a car that rides how I drive. Every other car I've owned everyone's all like "it's not a race car Joey... you cant drive like that" or theyre telling me Im a shitty driver. Well it wasnt me, it was the car. I drive the same in the Monte and Scott's like "you really drive this car well". Even the car likes how I driver her, I can tell. The whole way to `Daygwa he kept tellin me how well I drive. So I must really be driving well or he must really love me or must really have a death wish (gotta have a death wish to love me ha!). anyway, it's my car now muhahahaha gotta get Pez to airbrush somethin sweet on the hood.

Ran into Jonny but not Geoff. He says G's doin REALLY REALLY bad. "Jo, go to my house NOW and kick G in the ass, he'll listen to YOU. Ya disapeared and he hasnt been sober since... it's getting REALLY bad." so I need to call him or something, if I could... my brother still hasnt mailed my phone from Ohio. I knew I shoulda just drove there for it.

I applied to the VA in Batavia through the govt jobs website. Got a form letter wednesday just sayin they got the app and please look over this info to make sure it's right etc, so I was expecting a letter saying an interview date n time or something but it was just a form letter. I handed it to Scott and he was like "check this out" and there was a sticker on the other side that said "PLEASE NOTE: Your final rating was high enough to qualify you amongst the highest rated candidates. Your name was included on the Certificate of Eligibles issued for this vacancy" sounds really promising, whatever it means. My rating was an 88 but I dont understand how they rate someone just after reading a resume and job app.

I need to go home for a couple days and get some shit done. I want Scott to let me use the car, instead of driving me home. It's a big step, lotta trust involved there, I understand. Cant get shit taken care of without a car though, cant use my mom's car either.

Saw Vanfleet (ex almost step dad) on wednesday too, gotta date with him for dinner on sunday so he can meet Cassidy.

Also what else... Chad, my friend in Ohio that owns used cd (etc) stores, well when we were in Cbus we stopped there so I could show off how great Im doing (last he saw me I was junked out and blimped out). I ended up leaving him a note. Well yesterday I got an email from him.

"Hey Joey, I just found the note you left. I am so glad you are ok. Last time I saw you, you were in a "funk." Thats great you cleaned up. Keep it up. I hope you are hanging around positive people, because it is easy to fall back if it is around you all the time. New York huh? 2 year old huh? Congratulations. Are you coming back anytime soon? I bought Chris's store in Powell. He is a douche bag. I think of you because I like Tenacious D and see or hear Dave Grohl.
Later, Chad"

What a sweetheart, and he's cute too lol. He gave me his myspace link so I'm sure we'll keep in touch. I used to take Jake, (the autistic kid I nursed) to his store almost every day, Chad wouldnt even bitch when Jake would trash stuff. nearly every cd I own I bough from Chad. Seriously a thousand of them. They all have his store's sticker on em. ok anyway gotta go talk my boyfriend into letting me take his $30,000 car to my house for a couple days.....

Always remember to quit while you're ahead.

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