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get busy living or get busy dying or just "get busy" 05.01.08 1:16 p.m. Let's think positively: (maniacal laughter!) He had big dumb goofy ears. I wouldnt have wanted a dumbo-eared kid anyways. OK I didnt even plan on writing about him, well not at first, Im sure I woulda rambled onto that topic at some point. But really I just wanted to say that as soon as I get some extra money Im gonna build myself a skateboard that shames the one I built for Harlan. Where'd all this come from? pretty much it just popped into my head while listening to Lupe Fiasco, while being in an inverted yoga stance, head pointed at the floor, actually it was touching my ankle, other leg hooked way up over my body, and I thought "wouldnt this be the shit if I stalled like this at the top of a vert ramp!" and THEN I remembered DUH I'm thin and in shape enough to give skateboarding another shot. And now we're getting to the meat, this is what I wanted to say: It's time to put this fantastic new body to work for me. Friday night after the break up and I was alone, I went through his phone finding people to call. Well there was a new text msg and when I opened it it was a pic of a half naked good looking chick. It looked just like Jody, the best-friend slash new girlfriend or whatever he wants to call it. The face above the mouth was cut off, but the hair was blonde and the same length. It had been sent the previous Tuesday. So I got a little pissed at that. When I mentioned it to Jer, you know, now that he n I are such good friends we can talk openly about anything... anyway when I showed it to him he didnt think it was Jody but asked her about it and she said it wasnt her. So who the fuck is sending pics of their tits to my boyfriend's phone? They were decent tits too! He showed the pic to Bobby at work monday, he didnt know who it was either. So Bobby decides to call the number it was sent from. Turns out it's a guy named Tim who lives in Palmyra (next town over). He sez to Tim "why did you send a pic of a half naked chick to this phone?" and Tim sez "Oh you must mean Joey!" We'll add a paragraph break to let it sink in. The pic of the half naked hottie WAS ME!!! Not only don't I remember the pic being taken, nor do I remember sending it to Jer's phone, nor do I recognize what Im wearing, nor do I know who took the pic, why I let them, or where everybody else was at that party, or why it took over a week for one of us to see the text msg (the pic was taken and sent THREE tuesdays ago...) and why didnt Jerico or Bobby recognize me... so not only is this one bizarre mystery, on top of all of THAT... WHY DIDNT I RECOGNIZE MYSELF? Has the body dysmorphia gotten so bad? Obvious-fucking-ly it has gotten that bad. Damn, I say to myself, how'd I get my titties to look so good? It reminds me of one of the last times Jerico and I fucked. I had him tied down and I rode him. It was the best I ever performed on top. I have serious being on top issues, which Im sure all big girls have. This time was liberating though. It was a combination of him being restrained and me finally letting go, finding a rhythm and going after it. Still cant cum being on top but maybe with practice... and even though he lasted a couple minutes and not his usual 12 seconds, I think if I get on top of a man that can hold out longer I'd be able to get off. The same with dancing. You should see me dance when no one is looking. I need to get to a REAL dance club n shake my shit(u know, NOT line dancing lol rednex even dance like sheep!). So this summer is gonna be all about rollercoasters, skateboards, dance floors and being on top. I had a date with that chick yesterday. Shit was cool but then she took off early and didnt come home with me. I dont think her and I will ever fool around again, she keeps chickening out cuz of her boyfriend. I havent talked to her yet today and things might not be like that, but that's what Im feeling. I was looking forward to gettin some last night but that's alright. I can get some ANY night if I really wanted. Shit, I can walk into the store and buy a new Tik-toe! I took pics of what I was wearing last night, and FOR REAL I looked good. Like for around here seriously I was the best-looking most well-dressed girl in this town in years. Im not fucking kidding. This is not bloated "not-even-recognizing-my-own-hot-ass-titties" ego, that's just how ugly this area is. I need to get the fuck away from here. There's nothing to do but get drunk and die. Always remember to quit while you're ahead. |
About Me I am a bipolar genius, child abuse & addiction survivor, who is now a single mother who works 70 hours a week and has had gastric-bypass weight loss surgery a year ago. Wish me luck cuz I need it!!! Examples of My Insanity
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